emo-ish

hah. i hate this. when i muster the nerve or just become compelled to write...my thought process is gone. kinda like...i wish i could just tell someone about what was going on in my head...instead of writing it here. maybe thats the problem.

i guess in a way im feeling lonely.

ill just have to go on the fact that in some alternate universe my reality could be amazing and scary and that this feeling of lonliness is just a passing thing and ultimately...it'll come together in the end in some fantastical...or mundane darkness

fun fun fun

some things.

hey guys.

well for one thing...my video blog thing may take forever to accomplish for the following reasons:

1) not enough inspiration

2) too much stressful situations going on

3) not enough time

i finally got that job that i had been wanting for a while now. i started on nov 3rd. gettin paid on the 15th which is nice. i really cant wait to get out of the rut that we've been in for the past month or two. it's honestly our fault but at the same time...it was a good decision. the company i work for now is very employee friendly and the atmosphere trumps all my older jobs 100 fold. they actually CARE about their employees. also...

the fact that im making 30% more than i was a year ago...is absolutely unheard of. 

the real fact of the matter is with the right mindset, skills, and will...you can achieve your goals. my goal in this case was to find a job that was more of a home. a job with a great employer...great pay..and excellent benefits. i think i was coming home stressed the f out at my other jobs. whether it be the location, the ppl, the pay, the lack of benefits or simply the abuse i had to endure at my former jobs. im happier here. 

now...its just a matter of all that translating into my paycheck and paying off these damn bills. its not like we stuck ourselves in debt with credit cards or anything...or like we live above our means. its really about the timing of everything. we recently moved ($$$) i wasnt working ($$$$) lts wasnt working for a while...but is now ($$$$) 

see all of that adds up to a crazy game of catch up. believe me...we're smart with our money...well as smart as a young married couple can be anyways. its the catching up. sheesh...we dont go out every other night or anything like that. we've been surviving off of ramen noodles and hand-me-downs. 

i feel that the tides have changed however...and all my good karma points have accumulated enough for me to cash in...a bit. we'll see where this job takes me. but im def sticking to it. 

our goal is that in 2 years time...lts will be preggo. this will give us time to save money and establish ourselves. with everything in falling into place (the new job being just one of the steps)...i have a clear and positive outlook on our future. 

1) save monies

2) hood rich (save more monies)

3) purchase home

4) has babies

easy. LMAO

part 2 will be interesting.

but its key. otherwise the 2 year plan becomes a 4 year one. LMAO. 

oh yeah. im planning on writing a book. i had my rough outline somewhere but lost it. its ok though..the ideas are imbedded in my brain and i cant wait to get working on it. just need some trees and some time.

thats about it for now.

i havent changed...its sad to see ppl change...for the worst at least. 

tough times

so...things have been pretty tough...not like they havent been this whole time. its all about finances really.

im pretty sure as soon as im back in the game things will sort out accordingly.

thats all i have to say about that

new job, new apt, new plans...other shit

howdy yall! I haven't been prompted to write in here in a while. its hard to reflect wen you have 32921921734838000 things going on at once. here's a text I saved as a draft to myself...so I wouldn't forget:

reminder to self: mark wants to make a small black booth by the bed...that has a digi cam or sony cam on tripod...on like nighr vision setting...where I can sit and randomly video blog as I so chose. this idea is great bc u can click record on the cam and start pouring out ur brain....as apposed to writing...sometimes u forget things by the time they translate from brain to hand. remember that u want the room to be super dark...for a sense of solitude and quiet...in order to focus and relax. this came to me as I was thinking abt stuff like abt my mom and watnot. I'd write what I thot but I forgot...and it wouldn't come out rite the 2ne time around. u know how that goes. overthinking kills. then u forget everything. hehe I just came back from moving the car on a sat morning....lauren is sleeping beside me....im sorry I was a grump. lol. I like having this note to self. I think the sk3 has a "notes" section....but who really looks at that section? watever. I shud blog high all the time. my mom was always a controller. but that was her defense mechanism after being hurt so much as a kid...and from my father....she kinda blocked those out and started new...I guess in a sense me being born was a turning point. after that she never put herself in a situation or relationship where she'd allow herself to be hurt or brought down. she only looks back fondly to her 1st bf in the phil. that is now a dr with 3 kids. they're love was all romantical....I saw the letters and notes they had for each other. it was sweet. while with my father she tried to have some semblance of ronmance...but all her letters wud say stuff like abt her apologizing for not obeying and my mom weas being abused. that'll change how some1 thinks of love huh? I have to say...with how my mom has changed...its a complete 180...and its kinda scary. she's a lot more mellow...but at the same time she's a little less sharp if u will. just not as on point u know? bc...she used to be always on point to a t. im rambling now. its 10am. we shud get up =)
::

end text to self. lmao

haha wow! that was random huh? u know...the thing abt weed...personally...it helps increase the flow of thought. while sober...its like my thoughts are at a slower pace...yet allowing me to piece things together better. creative or emotional expression ftw for me though. I think im at THAT point in my life....I think I've spent too long being the model son. anywho!!!

so wats new?

new job:

got a new job...yes again. the fact that I just quit on a whim isn't so good...but depending on where ur priorities lie...ull see my point. I'd much rather be poor and be able to live freely and with lauren than to be tied to something that was stressing me out. I'd get home late from work with a distressed attitude...and that's not nice. I'd wake up pissed. all I had to look forward to was the few hours I spent with lauren b4 we went to bed and the wkends. I got a new job though in secaucus. the pay is a bit shabbier...but once it goes from temp to perm...there is a dramatic pay increase...im also searching my other options as well.

new place:

we moved into a pseudo 2br shotgun style apt. it has character. size wise we had to be creative with storage since there are NO closets watsoever. and we have a lot of erroneous shit. the place is nice though..and the cats love it bc they have semi-free roam. the kitchen owns and we have a lofted bed now! the housewarming will be soon...possibly in oct...to celebrate oktoberfest...ish

due to the stress of the new job in nyc...and the move...lauren n I had a lotta reorganizing or rethinking to do. lauren started working on monday at another vh...and I think its going well for her...I gotta say...im quite proud. the benefits, pay and hours really gel with what she's been asking for all this time...and the kicker is...her job now is less than half the work. heh.

new plans:

so...I should have went into botany instead of history in my original college plans

college will be on hold until further notice. work is in full effect...wow I became a statistic. but u gotta do wat u gotta do u know? its kinda hard supporting 2 ppl...working f/t...moving...going to skool and paying for all that at the same time. it doesn't help that my credit is shot due to poor decisions on my moms part in the past.

new plans include...some side business stuff. u wanna lend me 5K? I can make a great return on investment. hehe in 3months or so. hehe do it?

the art gallery plans are still a go. I have to remember to contact christine for some contact info.

the side business will be the fuel to the gallery-mobile.

and we want renewable organic energy. haha

other shit:

*time travel is possible
*we live in multiple dimensions
*religion survives due to the endless interpretations...and is needed

u know with religion...I just don't like the elitist attitude some have for/with it. haha im not talking abt u rr btw! methinks ur far from elitist. hehe...some soul searching does wonders for every1.

I think ever1 shud do so at some point...otherwise...u remain oblivious or complacent.

I really wonder what (if they do exist) intelligent life on other planets in scattered parts of the universe are thinking? wat do we seem like to them?

hmm...I have 20 mins left on lunch...I missed laurens lunch break I think. ack! that stinks =(

*video blogging ftw perhaps?

I think that's all for now. guna have dinner with some fam tonite...sounds splendid.

byeee =P

CAREERS?

how does someone become a Speech Writer?

bastards.

wowzers

i knew solar power will be part of the wave of the future of renewable energy.

the sun still has billions of years to go before life on earth is a no go. hehe

did you hear about the new coating that will be placed on solar panels? they will harvest energy in a more efficient manner. Also, the coating will be put on regular glass windows pretty soon...this way...buildings and homes will become self powering! 

can anyone say...solar panel coating on cars? 

thank you.

new stuff developing:

LTS and i are moving to BK. found a nice place...hopefully we'll get some replies and get to do some viewings.

famous ppl from Brooklyn

hehe do it.

ODB!! 

"Brooklyn zoo! shame on you when you step to the ol' dirty bastard"

lmao

POT = YAY (oh and one more thing on shrooms) oh yeah..and something about "corporate"

NY NATIVE SAYS "FUCK OFF POPO"

LEGAL MUCH?

PUERTO RICO IS DOING IT!

i coulda told these nigga's that! pssh! 

clicky!

the term "corporate" as defined by the dictionary relates to the uniting of people for a single purpose or goal. like a corporation. the modern conception of the term "corporate" has been widely skewed. dont you think? in today's terms, "going corporate" is succumbing to societal norms and turning an eye to unfairness. in the book entitled "Going Corporate" one of the points made is that when a company treats you unfairly, you "suck it up" 

now...i grew up filipino..and i grew up saying "yes" to everything..even though it was something that i dreaded or i knew was wrong. i, as an adult will not stand for ANYONE making decisions for me...especially when i know that i am right in the matter. 

in today's term's corporate also relates to yuppies getting out of college with that sheet of paper and going out in "corporate america" and working the 9-5. my argument with this is...

college does not equal intelligence nor aptitude nor ability nor talent nor creativity

completion of college = you were able to afford 4+ years of school

now...with completion of college comes...completion of paying off of loans (unless you're some genius or extremely poor...received govt funding and still decided to go to school even though you know your family couldnt afford it in the hopes for a better future because society has drilled it into the minds of young urbanites that college is the answer)

college...is NOT the answer

corporate world is NOT the answer

above all..YOU are the answer. 

yes...do you think jesus went to college? look at this guy...he commands billions even 2008 (or so they say) years after his death! did he go corporate? nahh! actually jesus is probably one of the biggest rebels of society EVER!

yes...EVER

he was pissed with the way religion was and decided to change things. he studied on his own...

he did however believe to be the son of god...and along the way convinced a whole crapload of ppl that he's right...even after being dissapointed countless times.

so anyway.

corporate is gay. sorry

ask jimi hendrix

If 6 Was 9 - Jimi Hendrix

(yeah, sing a song bro...)
If the sun refused to shine
I dont mind, I dont mind
(yeah)
If the mountains ah, fell in the sea
Let it be, it aint me.
(well, all right)

Got my own world to live through and uh, ha !
And I aint gonna copy you.

Yeah (sing the song brother...)
Now if uh, six uh, huh, turned out to be nine
Oh I dont mind, I dont mind uh ( well all right... )
If all the hippies cut off all their hair
Oh I dont care, oh I dont care.
Dig.

cause Ive got my own world to live through and uh, huh
And I aint gonna copy you.

White collar conservative flashin down the street
Pointin their plastic finger at me, ha !
Theyre hopin soon my kind will drop and die but uh
Im gonna wave my freak flag high, high !
Oww !

Wave on, wave on...

Ah, ha, ha
Fall mountains, just dont fall on me
Go ahead on mister business man, you cant dress like me
Yeah !

Dont nobody know what Im talkin about
Ive got my own life to live
Im the one thats gonna die when its time for me to die
So let me live my life the way I want to
Yeah, sing on brother, play on drummer

______________________________________

'sactly

thats all folks =D

sploring.

so...in the near future...life will be sustainable on mars. 

i knew it. we all knew it. heaven doesnt exist in the sky...space does. =D

heaven exists more in our souls or in our hearts. 

anywho! i have a whole lot to talk about but its just random ranting...i think ill wait til i get home to write. in the meantime ill write little notes on post-it's so i wont forget all the useless knowledge i will be dropping on you guys =D

i hope the article will suffice for now. =D

anniversary?

hi!

yesterday was lauren and i's first year anniversary! woot. it's the paper anniversary. hehe so i figured in that case, i'd get her books or something =)

i ended up getting her something more thoughtful than sweet. i should have planned it better to incorporate both thoughtful and sweet. well iono i guess lauren will be the judge of that. hehe

i got her..a book about (and with awesome pictures) asian and african ethnic jewelry. its pretty snazzy=D

we had ashiya for dinner...haha we were stuffed! w0ot.

also! yesterday at work...the company paid to take me out for lunch! hehe it was pretty rad! w0ot.

anywho. i've been thinking about bringing my journal with me so that i can readily write my observations as i go along throughout the day. heh.

i noticed my older entries had more substance. *shrugs*

i guess that's it for now. i dont wanna get in trouble at work n stuffs.

foggio + craigslist + ceba = fun times

hi all!

so last night after work i headed out to CEBA on 8th st to meet with lts and later on with rr. fun times i must say!

it (the times) started out slowly and ever so sneakily became oh so fun.

at Ceba they had an exibition for Foggio. the art was pretty fantastical! i really enjoyed the Buddha piece. hehe art is so funky. one medium sized piece on canvas with acrylic went for about $800. insane yes?

for this you are def paying for the art. imean shit...we can probably get all the art supplies we want...for next to FREE! no one would prob want MY art tho. i can hardley draw if my life depended on it. 

heheh...we just need out securities advisor to offer their services. LMAO!!!!

so anywho! the night ensues and we meet this pretty kool chick...brandi (brandi with an "i" like the song she says). haha so yeh rr meets this girl off of craigslist due to a sweetly surprising ad which included a lolcat pic. awesomeness?

craigslist is like an amalgamation of randomness all on one site. hmm..kinda like "ground up" no?

hmm...i like the word "amalgamation" or like "amalgamous" or whatever conjugated form of the word u can think of. i was thinking at one point...the gallery could be called "Creative Amalgamation" or something like "Amalgamated Perspective" i dont know how ppl will handle the word though. it's a sucky thing but i think many would have a problem with the word...they'd be like "uh..dictionary.com?" lolz

if that

anyways...turns out that brandi is like super janitor crazy artsy...i carry cool calling cards and...i have a pterodactyl on my chest which encompasses my entire frontal region girl. fun!

jjl and hl were there doing the usual: taking care of business...partying like rockstars...being hilarious...drinking stella like its the the cure for cancer...being quite welcoming and humble all at the same time! whew!

jjl seemed a lil on edge. lts can tell you why. lolz

celo...no no im sorry...Shadow King and ld (with bf) stopped by...ld's bf seemed nice but pretty antisocial. i dont get it when ppl are in a social situation with new ppl and work hard at STAYING antisocial! usually it takes me a minute or so to warm up and get talkative n watnot...but this guy was like...in another part of the bar...in the corner...alone. LOL..fag?

yes

anywho. the night ended nicely...got home smoked it up and went to bed. haha i have to say....i enjoyed sleep last night. i was pretty high b4 bed to say the least. lolz. i was like giggley in my dreams hehehe!!

woke up disgruntled due to the fact that NO1 wants to wake up at around 6am to go to work...unless your job makes you $4085405408504/hr playing games all day. imagine?!?!

imagine...if your job was to simply play "Helicopter" all fucking day?! haha that would be kinda funny. 

level 4 woot

haha...do it?

i just remembered that i like puttin links =D

w0ot!

craigslist is so random...ceba was random. i heart randomness! w0ot!

anywho..the boss is out AGAIN today yay!! hehehehe sneakky!

i think thats all folks. will do this again another day! byes

yo nigga

the theme for this blog will be called "experiments"

haha...wow its been forever since i've updated this blog.

things of note:

shrooms

haha that's about it! hahaha jk jk! there's really a lot to discuss...like anyone really cares! i think i'll try and get in a little update then i'll rant about something that i feel is of importance...well not really but something interesting or watever. enjoy?

new crap:

had some umbrella's recently! the first batch didnt work so well for me actually...it really hit lts however! lol niiice love! but the second batch i must say was an overall success. everyone at some point reached level 4 psy level. rr had some difficulties however. stupid vomites. lol. mb was good though especially with her feet wiggling n watnot lmao. it was good times had by most i shuold say. poor rr...kawawa! it's all good! we just gotta get some more...eat less...and be in a better mind set!

work? yes! i quit my job at IDS. they were just being completely jerky and abusive. i was dreading coming in to work like every day! its that insane! haha so yeh i quit rite before we left to the Philly Tattoo convention!! and then now i have a new job in NYC! hehe its actually working out pretty nicely on the job homefront for me. this new place seems like they're on the ball when it comes to facilitating their employee's needs. thats what i needed. IDS was an old family run business that went corporate but forgot to change all the HR crap to corporate status. nothing was being followed in the employee handbook by the company. oh well.

got the new job. so its all g. =D woot.

lts has put in her 2 weeks notice and this is her last week at npt. its a little discouraging though i must say. it's scrary being without monies for long periods of time. i think it'll work out fine though. i wasnt working for a few weeks while finding a new job...so i have no doubts that she'll find something that she'll enjoy and that will coincide with her school schedule nicely. *knocks on wood*

salvia? hahaha it makes you feel quite trippy....and it's legal!

hi5 for legal highs!

hmm the sem is over. thank you jeebuz! (still gotta register though! wow lag)

at the philly convention jonjon did my back! hmm ill post a pic as soon as i can find one!

hmm...lts got tatted up...as well as rr! w0ot! gooo high rollers! wee!

mb moved out. what a bummer! it was pretty nice having ppl over all the time...it was almost like Forrest's house in Forrest Gump! "momma always liked having all kinds of people around the house" haha and see what happens?!?! Elvis stops by and magic happens! w0ot! LMAO. you get the gist! psssh!

my rolling skills have improved greatly =D

i think i would like to start a paraphenalia company. like sell pipes and bongs and all the things you need to properly use, maintain and enhance these items!

that'll be nifty!

ive been looking more into commercial space for the gallery. its all so super expensive...especially with what we want. we would like a small-med sized warehouse space to act partly as a showroom. in addition we would need the ceilings to be high enough to create a second loft style landing for us (the owners) to live in. below there would be the showroom, open space, a work area, a front desk and a small office or two. in the loft area it would serve as a nice apartment...while downstairs would be for the gallery and etc.

ultimately it would be nice to have a space for music, art, and learning. for names of the place i had some  thought up.

one of my fave's would be "Ground Up" so it would be "Ground Up Galleries"

it would be a kool names on multiple levels.

originally i wanted specialty coffee there as well so the name would have made a lot more sense! but!!! the phrase "ground up" also implies that the work was started on a lower level...for example when starting a new career...to advance...you work yourself from the "ground up" also...when things are "ground up," they are mixed! the idea is to have this one place for all your artistic needs!

one of my fave aspects is the custom jewelry shop! lts will (if she's still up for it in a few years) be setting up her shop within the gallery and would be one of the major draws to the location! lts specializes in minitures, wire, semi precious stones and metals, glass and ceramics. oh wow that's a lot! LMAO

im not even half as talented. i can write my ass off though =X

we'll see what happens though. i think i'll feel at ease when this dream comes to fruition.

i have 40 mins left at work btw.

i guess that's all for now. guna go home, clean our asses off (after some nice smokable), and just chill out =D

byes!

"Little Wing" - Jimi Hendrix

so...there's so much to report...but no time to do it in.

i just wanted to express how much i love lauren. LOL i know its cheesy.

here's some lyrics to Jimi Hendrix's "Little Wing" it's a song he wrote for his wife and stuff...i thought to myself...if i was Jimi...and Lauren was his girl...this would be my song for her. enjoy the lyrics...

"Little Wing" - Jimi Hendrix

Well shes walking through the clouds
With a circus mind thats running round
Butterflies and zebras
And moonbeams and fairy tales
Thats all she ever thinks about
Riding with the wind.

When Im sad, she comes to me
With a thousand smiles, she gives to me free
Its alright she says its alright
Take anything you want from me, anything
Anything.

Fly on little wing,
Yeah yeah, yeah, little wing


LOL i dunno...it just feels pretty nice hearing this. its so simple...yet complex. its an endearing song and just make me feel nifty about being with lauren. i want my ipod...damn thing needs to get charged!!

WRITE

i wish i was able to write more. it's hard when you arent supposed to have access to the internet if it's not work related. LOL. things have been smashing lately.

I think what i am going to do is start writing in that cool journal lauren got me and then eventually transfer to blog. i was thinking color scanner? that'd be nifty -=o)

ok...more to come tomorrow...in my wave journal at least. sorry blogger. i tried. =(

about work

note to self:

mark,

please remember to blog about how idiotic your coworkers are. please remember to refer to them as characters in a cartoon. after you have done this, dont forget to analyze each of them...at least the stupid ones. there are some at work that don't need to be made fun of.

[edit]

oh yeah...also remember to write about parents being proud of their kids. thats all =D

[edit 2]

oh yeah... i wanted to write something about Peter Cullen (voice for Optimus Prime, Eeyore, Murky Dismal...and more)

LOL!

oh yeh...i <3 Murky from Rainbow Bright...my sneezes sound like his. HEEHHE =)

new stuff?

hey y'all

so...did you guys vote democrat this past super tuesday? i didnt get to vote. i should have.

but i guess it didnt make much difference. i was on the fence about who to pick anyways. It looks like the race is somewhat neck and neck. Clinton has a little more clout but Obama...i must say is the more powerful and inspiring speaker. Sometimes when i hear Clinton talk i think she's not sure or something. Her husband however...he was inspiring...the funny thing is ...wow Bill has gotten so old...and now he's like...an old guy...have you seen him recently? i miss when he was kool and stuff. arg.

so who to pick? i say...Obama.

he did some coke...he's black....he's muslim

what more can you ask for?

lmao?

maybe

Either choices are strong to say the least but none stand apart from the other. I say Obama for the sheer fact that he has more to prove...and has the vision to acheive it.

I love how candidates always are like "oh...we're going to do this, this and that" but never really show us their actual plan of action.

In class one day we were discussing the universal healthcare issue...which in theory is AWESOME...but when you think about it....who pays for it? we do...out of our tax dollars. There are always ppl that will abuse the system...leaving the ones who reaaaaally need the attention...out of luck.

Healthcare today is a major problem anyways...there has to be a comprimise

ok ok ...enough election crap. all i know is...no conservatives please! Please...no more iraq (especially when it SHOULD have been Iran to begin with...and no...there's no WMD's).

on a lighter note...please legalize marijuana. kthnx =D

hmm...over the weekend "superbowl sunday" we didnt celebrate in ordinary fashion. im pretty sure LTS or i has filled you in. but let me put down my reactions to the fun:

we hung out at CEBA on sunday and saw sword swallowing, a belly dancer, a fire dancer chick...and some vagina/penis inspired wooden art made from scrap wooden pieces. it was pretty nifty.

i must say however...in the beginning i felt like LTS and i were the young kids at the older kids party. but as the night wound down and ppl started leaving...it was us and the CEBA crew with the circus freaks..LOL i dont think they mind being called that. but if you guys do..sorry. hehe 

so..we mention something to the effect to sarah (piercer) that we were still interested in the mustache tats from peewee. she just said the word and next thing you knew...we were in the back getting inked up. fo flea nikka!

yes. fo flea.

granted...peewee was drunk and high off his ass. so bad that...when the night was over and our fingers were wrapped up...he was like "whoah...what happened to you guys?" and we were like "you tattoo'ed us" and he's like "i did?" LMAO.

something to that effect...

by the end of the night...we felt like we were part of the crew. which is pretty kool =D hopefully we'll be able to make it to the philly convention.

in other news:

that www.passiveaggressivenotes.com site that LTS has on her blog is hilarious.

im at work trying to pretend i am working...hehe.

oh let me post this email that i wrote to one of the big dogs in the company...its interesting me thinks.

where's my fuckin raise biatch!

Mark, thanks for your note. I am not familiar with your particular case as I am fairly new here. Please allow me to research and either I or your supervisor will get back to you in a few days. In terms of changes going forward – you are correct. I hope that the employees such as yourself, who are interested and motivated, will help the company drive through the changes in communication, career planning and progression, benefits support etc., which we are committed to. Thanks again for your input and questions.


Rgds


Paul



--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Mark Elgueta, US-IDS
Sent: Wednesday, February 06, 2008 1:34 PM
To: Paul McGuire, US-IDS
Subject: Re: Communication Briefing


Paul,


I am not sure if this question should be directed to you, but I felt that you would be the best person to ask. Let me know if I should be asking someone else this question and I will direct my questions accordingly. As far as job titles and descriptions go, how are those levels determined, and what do the specific job titles encompass? I guess I would need a better understanding of the title descriptions to know where and if my current title fits. As it stands, I do not feel that my duties, responsibilities, and skills match the title and job code. If there was room to make adjustments, what opportunities do we have as employees to prove our merit besides the hard work that we all put in daily? I hope I am not overstepping myself here but I was curious and concerned. I enjoy the challenge of working here, the environment that is IDS, and I love where the company is headed…but I feel that a lot of changes still need to be made on the part of employee satisfaction to maintain high morale. Thank you for your time and consideration


Best regards,


Mark Elgueta

Snr Asst. - Finance
IDS Impac Ltd.
Phone: (201) 617-7777 Ext 274

Fax: (201) 617-9250

Email: Mark.Elgueta@IDSGroup.com

fun

i sent mine first...and his reply was above my email

*shrugs*

Fuck you BioFuel

Do it MDI!!! this is the future!


haha you idiots! Biofuel is WACK! uhm...we need machines with NO emissions. our vehicles need to be powered by some alternate power source. i like solar energy equipped with a generator...combined with compressed air technology.

recently LTS and i saw a show on discovery...or natgeo about compressed air cars...and how they are trying to develop an on board system that would have your car run on compressed air and run as long as the system generates the air. the system...could be powered by the solar panels that stored energy with the generator.

fun

Go Go Gadget LEG!

speaking of alternate power source...we as described by The Matrix...are slowly being used as a power source ourselves!!!! its scary but true.

this newly dev gadget enables you to create a charge of electricity that with one minute of walking can charge your cellphone for 10 mins! w0o0t w0ot? so long to "oh nooo...my phone's about to die"

 Lmao

read the article its kinda cool...the technology is really meant to in the future...power prosthetic shit and the like.

Google...you sneaky bitches

hahaha...good job Google.

if you didnt know already...there is a front runner for the bandwidth that is up for auction...it looks like Verizon might be picking it up...good for you verizon...the $4.6+ BILLION price sticker is oh so attractive. LOL...NOT! it may in the long run be a good deal for VZ...but here's the rub.

Google started the bidding war...and made the FCC agree that if the bids for the bandwidth exceed 4.6bil, the bandwidth must be open access. supposedly...Google really was trying to be tricky...have someone else buy up the bandwidth at mega expensive so that open access would be possible...and Google would be creating a whole buttload of apps for cellphone makers like Nokia and Samsung. oh Google...you tricky mother fuckers. That's why to work at google you need to be a graduate from a top tier school. bitches.

so now...google can save their billions and create new technology apps so you can do everything with your phone.

did you know you can fuckin text your order to pizza hut and they will deliver? hahaha insaneness

there is no spoon

thats all folks. if i think of more later ill update.

=P

edit:

oh yeh...rock band IS coming to WII.

and i want solar and wind power in my house. =D

think green. wo0o0


edit:

Do it Bayonne gym teacher! LMAO! idiot


hahaha ok..nite nite

Ninja's!

haha...whoah. these guys should go on ninja warrior.

newho...im home...i duno if lts knows it but im gunna be running some errands today hehe w0ot. enjoy the video...its pretty much insane.

the printer is busted! w0ot!?

so...the printers at work have a networking issue...so we really cant work. imean...i COULD do some work...but i wouldnt be able to complete it because i cant print out invoices or necessary back up.

ny time article

read that article!

oh Pres. Bush...too little too late buddy. why did he and his advisors wait until we were in the middle of a recession to decide to lower interest rates and to offer tax credits? well...he wants to look like a fucking hero.

normal ppl will look at his latest move as a saving grace to our economy...but he put us in this position in the first place. i'll take any free money that i can get though. according to the ny times article..and also in the wash. post and the la times...Bush set out a plan to pay out a $300.00 stipend tax relief to all workers that made at least $3,000.00. this concession is for low income households. according to the plan....you are considered "low income" if your household makes less than $150,000.00

i guess ill be gettin my check in the mail.

w0ot.

lts too

we're po' mofo's

LMAO

i guess you can say that A LOT of the country is considered low income...i like the term "working class" better. we're those ppl that if we stopped working...we have unemployment...if we dont find a job b4 unemployment is over...we're pretty much skrewed. middle classer's have a little more room for comfort. upper class ppl...fuck you. fuck you...yet i would like to be you. hehe.

mo money mo problems.

no money...mo problems

no matter what...there's problems...i think if you had money though...it makes dealing with the probs a little easier though. dont u think? the ppl that let their issues get out of hand...especially the rich...are fucking idiots.

ok now im just bantering.

something of substance...

weed article

webMD article on THC cancer effects


_____________

more stuff:

the other day i im'd a friend of mine that i used to hang out with...yeno with the gay girls...and i was like "hey lets hang sometime soon" and i was like "yeh lets catch up" this person had some stuff to tell me about like who they are seeing now and watnot.

when i asked to hear the story...the person was like "oh next time....you dont come out anymore anyways"

i must say...i was pretty hurt by this.

if you know me...you know that im pretty much down for anything...so long as no1 gets hurt or something or if i have actual time lol. but to automatically assume that i wont be able to hang out or something...or to assume that its my choice not to hang out...is false. most (not all ppl ) my age or younger...live at home, have minimal bills, have no responsibilities but to themselves, have part time jobs that wont matter if they lose them.

look at it in my perspective...

i work full time.
i go to school...full time
i'm married
i have bills
i have responsibilities to myself..and the ppl around me

i basically have...no time.

especially no time to go out partying and wasting money.

yes going out once in a while is def. cool...but wow...some ppl go out...ALL THE TIME. just bc...you go out..ALL THE TIME...and i dont have a chance to go out...doesnt make me the party pooper.

i hate that.

its like "oh mark didnt come out that one time...so we shudnt bother asking him to come out"

it was someone's bday the other day...i just found out through someone's fb...ok...why wasnt i invited? i guess it just escaped their minds. THEN  they complain "oh havent seen you in forever..where have you been? how come you dont come out."

quite frankly.

i dont come out...bc you dont invite me.

fuckin A.

when im making my dough and living the life...you're gunna want to hang out with me all the time..and you know what...then i REALLY wont have time for you.

ok. wow

anger.

danger.

LMAO.

thats funny...

anger and danger are almost the same. heh.

thats all i have to say for now...b4 my brain explodes.

bye guys.

if we speak regularly...then this isnt about you. LOL.

_________

edit:

diet coke vs. coke zero

now...you would think that coke would do away with diet coke...being that coke zero tastes better...and is better overall as far as nutritional value goes.

but coke...i must say...is probably the best run company in the world.

its a fuckin money making machine.

sugar (or sugar substitute) + carbonated water + color = COKE! = MONEY at low cost

fucking geniuses

you know that our modern view...or view period of what Santa Claus looks like is because of Coke right? hehe...bastards! i wish i had gone back in time and invested in coke. id keep that stock...it's stable.

i'd invest in microsoft too...but i dunno...the Zune...come on now. the product is good but they're going about it all wrong. first of all...they werent firrst. fuckin apple turned from a company in the negs into one of the hottest stocks on the market...thanks to fuckin ipod. good ol' ipod lol.

more news bc i heart the news...good news at least


fuckin Reuters...you rock! hahaha

all you Xbox lovers...fuck you! hahahaha JK

the Wii is still kicking your ass.

the problem?

MARKETING

those damn japanese sure know how to market and package a product!

the Wii...is cheaper (or less expensive...whatever), and appeals to a broader audience. yes the Xbox CAN appeal to everyone...bc they have many of the same games...but the target market for Xbox is the hardcore gamers.

let us not forget that the idea of the home video game industry was to bring entertainment into homes...not JUST to hardcore gamers. i remember when i was little...my ENTIRE family would sit around and watch other family members play fuckin Excite Bike or Super Mario Bros.

you go Wii

now convince Harmonix to make Rock Band for the Wii. its the right thing to do...yeh? LOL

ok thats all forreallll now.

byes =D

___

edit: i lied

here's a poem i found from April 2005. it turns out that lts and i have been together since 2004 hehe its been so long i almost forgot!! so to commemorate our time together..here's like this poem/song thingy i wrote :

Ohh i think we’ve almost made it
Everyone’s so screwed up
That we seem pretty damn normal
We’re as close to perfect can be
I need to pinch myself to see
Is this really real?
Is this just my inexplicable dream?

Oh dream of mine…
You come by every time
I’m down and out
Tired and alone
Lost and confused
You make me want to stay asleep
And never wake again

Id love to die sleeping knowing
If I knew that your voice was
The last I got to hear
Pinch me again so that I know
That you aren’t just a dream
My simple fantasy

Oh dream of mine…
You come by every time
I’m down and out
Tired and alone
Lost and confused
You make me want to stay asleep
And never wake again

The other night I opened my eyes
And you where lying next to me
I guess this isn’t a dream
I guess…

You are the fantasy
My ideal reality
Come true
Yes it’s you

Oh dream of mine…
You come by every time
I’m down and out
Tired and alone
Lost and confused
You make me want to stay asleep
And never wake again

But since you’re real…

My eyes are wide open

And I’m happier because of it

----

it sounds like a song huh? if i could play some instrument...id write music to the lyrics. eh anywho

now im done! hehe byes!

random stuff.

there are many topics for discussion today...w0ot!

emails:

ok...so i have come to the conclusion that emailing ROCKS. it may rock more than IM's. here's why:

i am on aim all day...and get random im's...mostly from cr. usually i dont have time to respond or when i do have a moment to reply...that person isnt online anymore.

hence, emails. you get the message even while  you are out...and you can reply at your convenience. i like the idea of writing a letter and getting a response like..pen pals! LOL. it's kool! ppl dont have much conversation anymore anywaays...i think emailing is a nifty way to bring it back.

i remember back when i did my paper on poet Elizabeth Bishop...throughout her life she wrote letters to colleagues and friends. many other famous old school authors did the same! and i think that rocks!

you know what. fuck it..im guna do it! hmm if not emails...snail mail sounds pretty kool too huh? last letter i wrote was to lts when she was still in fl. hehe i miss that. its so much better having her here tho...obviously...but yeno...writing is fun. LMAO.

Cloverfield:

so...i wanted to talk about cloverfield the movie....what is the creature? well supposedly its like some deep sea creature that was dislodged or something from the depths of the ocean trenches. LOL...i wouldnt put it past the earth to have some funky creatures deep down in the oceans...but come on now...a monster that huge? hahaha...i like the one idea that aliens came and mutated the mofo's and its on the attack! LOL. we'll see what happens in pt 2! LMAO...i bet its gunna be in japan or something...those 3 guys will still be alive...and they'll be like the masters against cloverfield lol. like...they'll know the ins and outs of it..bc they have first hand exp. lmao...if this was a D&D adventure...we'd be cloverfield experts. LOL.

as for the movie however...i did enjoy the concept...yes it was blair witch meets godzilla...i must say though...this had a little more impact on me though. especially since i live near the area that the movie was made for. imdb doesnt list nyc as a shooting location btw. lol. so yeh...i think i would have liked to see it from a more scientific point of view. imean...the draw to the movie was the creature...not so much..the pov style of the movie. well i digress. they MADE it seem like the main focus was the creature...but the REAL focus was the pov style. it gave me a headache. and it did give me the chills at certain points.

good movie. i got it. but i was wanting more.

SNS:

lol...the acronym sns is pretty funny when i think about it. "shit nigga shit" LMAO.

so that lead me to think about the whole cuddle n care thing. cnc...sounds kinda kool ey? so like..say you have this yuppie couple...and they go away on vacation..they can be like "hey lets call those cnc guys" LOL..fun

Marketing Class:

the other night..we were told to work individually on a problem...the question was "if you were to present to your company as if you were a consultant that the company was to become marketing oriented...how would you present your case and what steps would you take"

this was a fairly easy question...given the experience that we have already from the class, real world experience and with help from the text. some classmates broke into groups right off the bat and decided to have their own discussions. in turn, they ended bantering for a good 20 mins about how they should go about things...

as we learned in class...this is called "lack of planning" yes it sounds good to brainstorm with a group...and yes that is the idea..especially in marketing. but they didnt even give themselves a chance to organize their ideas individually first. my group however...got our answers on our own...then got together and compared ideas and notes. we spent way less time and got the same...if not better answers and we ended up looking like the dummies because we werent so talkative...we were just like "we got it already...theres no more need for the discussion..lets just relax"

theres this one indian chick in my class...she was also in my intl business class...and i must say...i hate her. LOL. well not hate..but dislike. shes  the one person that always has the answer. granted...thats fine...if you know the answer..and are fine with speaking up...thats fine...but she just has this whole arrogance about it....like she's the shit. its like come on now...we all have the same answer...we're all pretty much on the same level here...well some more than others....but dood...dont try and act like you're better than everyone.

ok next topic.

oh yeh.

i got pulled over today.

some young rookie cop typa guy...methinks rr would think he's cute lmao. but anywho...he was driving the opposite way...busted a u-ey..and pulled me over because i had my lic plate on the dashboard instead of screwed onto the front of the car...he also mentioned that the car needed to get inspected. he was right though...but imean i wasnt doing anything illegal in particular...so he really had no reason to pull me over...i felt like he was looking for someone to bust. like i guess he saw the rice-rocket-esque car..with the tinted windows and the rejected inspection sticker..lmao...and he was like "oh..here's one of those fast and furious guys...lemme get him for illegal crap" sorry buddy..my license is clean.

he let me go...no warning...no ticket...he was just like "alright..just make sure you put your license plate up front"

haha douche

Heath Ledger:

aka "Heathy" as quoted by imdb. lol...they said that that's his nickname...i thought that "heath" itself would already have been the nickname...bc his REAL name was Heathcliff...yes...like the cat. anywho...his death was pretty tragic... especially with his career finally taking off.
he had some movies out but i dont think he was really coming into his own yet...and i think that's what most of the ppl in hollywood are saying about him. kawawa

sleeping pilled himself to death? i duno bout that...something had to have prompted that...or it may have possibly been foul play. w0o0o. csi anyone?

taxes:

dood...we gots to do the taxes ASAP! yey school tax creds!! do  it!!


lts!!

congrats btw love! w0ot w0ot!

i just have one more thing to say:

i am really looking at life more optimistically than in the past. the work situation may not be too hot..but im looking at the future in a new light.

start up a business...start up a family...start living healthily (this still includes smokin it up...im preventing cancer...what do you want from me?!)


thats all folks

gnite!

old haiku's

hi guys!

things of note: sorry if i dont actively comment on your blogs guys. i read em though! when i gets a chance. heh. i will be more proactive in this however.

ok..

so i felt like posting up some of my older poems on here...here's some haiku's i wrote in '06. enjoy =D

set 1
1
caffiene injection
please keep my motor running
cure for sleep deprived

2
little leaf glides through
clumsily slicing the air
gently crashing down

3
birds hang on a wire
contemplating life from high
and crapping on heads

4
salacious sally seems
so surprisingly sapless
secretly she shines

5
he trudges along
walking a path of quicksand
the persistant slug

6
eyes closed in deep sleep
nightly dreams of you sneak in
filled with starry skies

set 2

1
the computer screen
blinks as codes are entered in
this shift must end soon

2
time dwindles away
sluggishly moving slower
like drying cement

3
walls stare blankly
while my mind begins to drift
ring! wake up asshole!

4
you are beautiful
more than the brightest of stars
nothing else compares

5
uncontrollable
urges within my system
love and devotion

6
only deep sleep saves
from times when you are away
dreams set on repeat

7
flowers may wither
stones may transform into dust
yet love's eternal

8
tender kisses last
planted in my memory
and etched in my heart

ok thats all folks. lts is back from class and i have to hit up class by 7pm boo! haha byes =D

at school.

so...its my second day back at school. i have class at 7pm so i have about 3 hours to kill. i opted to stay at school after dropping lts to her class so i wouldnt have to drive back and find another parking spot n watnot. i begrudgingly drove lts to school hehe...but it turns out she had the master plan all along...whether she knew it or not...hehe. by me being a lazy ass and not wanting to go back home after coming to school...knowing i would have to go back anyways...i stayed here chilling in the comp lab...and finally blogging. ahhh...the sweet sound of mind release. lmao. sounds corny but its so true.

doesnt it feel so good to let stuff off ur chest after it's built up? not that i have something on my chest that needs to be expressed so...hardcorely (sorry..the word was fitting) but i mean in general. like you know how the whole castaway movie was..and the whole i am legend was...the main characters had someone...or something that they could express themselves to (who knows if they were listening). do you think if they had a blog...they'd be pretty much set? lets say that they didnt have internet but had someway...be it paper and pencil...or broke ass computer...to record their thoughts, feelings and be able to reflect or discuss the world around them.

you know what that just made me think of? ancient humans!! yey. blogging...is the modern version of cave paintings.

i would say that keeping a diary or a journal would be related as well but i think blogging is much closer. check it.

a written journal or diary is for more safe keeping and for the writer only (unless they decide to publish it)
a blog...is put out there for everyone to see...well it can be kept private...but eventually can be found publicly

cave paintings were mostly in homes or public meeting places for our ancestral brethren. they were mostly discovered but many were like public notice boards

haha ok wait

ill talk about something else now. hehe i hope you didnt tease. discuss

ok ok.

so i miss lts. hehe its funny calling her "lts" bc shouldnt it be "ltse" ? or like "lts-e" ? heh watev. she's probably looking for a rusty spoon to kill herself with rite about now...since she's in that writing class. i think it'll be good for her though. i loves me some writing. at one point i wanted to be like a national geographic journalist n watnot. i may be too pussy for that though. i guess id need like some trained colleagues that can fight off some lionesses if they get out of hand a la Wild Boys (you know they had that guy who looked like a bushman who was there just in case something happened) or Stever Ervin (rest in peace nig). i dont think im gunna fuck with stingrays though...yes they only attack if provoked...but shit...i dont wanna be attacked period. you wont see me wrestling any insert dangerous animal here. so yeh. college right...yeh it rocks but sucks at the same time.

i really enjoy the feeling that i am doing something good for myself...like you're actually fullfilling some purpose. isnt it great? lol. im not being sarcastic...

ok...

after this part above...i had a huge fucking blog written out. i went back in to edit...and for some reason the html made something weird and now im basically missing 80% of my blog. fuckin-a!

so...

i talked about:

* my job...how everyone there...for the most part are assholes.
* i needs a raise...and im putting my foot down but its difficult
* how everyone needs education in order to not unemployed due to the industry evolving faster than u
* how i would like to write more and how i loves haiku's due to their profoundness in few words
* how i would not like to kill...but in the case of being attacked by a zombie that i would "kill a nigga"
* i wrote something about weed but i forgot what.
* i wrote about how i liked that helicopter game on addictiongames.com and how lts likes that drunk pirate game
* i wrote out a mock conversation between me and my boss...and how i pull out gats on their ass...this is purely fiction.


thank god i added those labels...hahahaha otherwise all would have been lost. i heart you labels. thanks

=D

ok now i will go to http://www.addictinggames.com/ and play some helicopter game until lts comes to the comp lab and tells me all about how horrible class was. hehe. it might not be horrible! w0o0o...that'd be kool. hehe =P

hi =)

i swear i had a lotta stuff to say today! i just dont remember them at the moment! i swear i didnt smoke today LOL.

speaking of marijuana...its good for you.

there are studies recently written in the american journal of medicine indicating that certain chemical substances found in marijuana have been shown to slow down the progression of cancer in the body. previous studies showed that this phenomena was seen in lab rats. new studies confirm that this may also be true in humans as well. w0ot science.

the only problem with the issue of marijuana is that it is falsely illegal. lts and i watched a small part of reefer madness the other night (we have seen it in its entirety before) and i must say, reefer madness is complete madness. HEH. supposedly weed is the scourge of civilization. i say...if the babylonians were smokin it up...shit...its good enough for me too. the ancient babylonians mapped out the stars and the universe before modern day science...and they were accurate!

i spent most of my day pretty much just lounging around i guess you can say. i woke up, dropped lts off at work, went home played "Dope Wars" on Facebook for a few and chilled with the cats. oh yeh...lts and i have 4 cats and 1 cat that we need to get adopted out! any takers? LOL. here's the list (in no particular order):

chewie - behemoth all orange tabby with some white markings, named chewie...short for chewbacca due to his funky vocal sounds

rambo - the leader of the bunch and also the biggest ham..EVER! he's a grey and white tabby

luna - rambo's sister...she's pretty ninja-ish but her skills are more in stealth. sometimes she just blends in with random stuff. shes bitchy when she wants...but for the most part shes a sweety

ophie - short of ophelia, named after the crazy bitch in Hamlet that killed herself over him...lmao. i'd say she takes the cake when it comes to cat-ninjaness...she does wall kicks off of random crap...like my legs and watnot. she doesnt mind being manhandled so thats kool too.

mama cat - we are currently fostering mama cat...shes actually rambo and luna's mom...she's probably the prettiest of the bunch...she's more of a one cat household kinda cat because she freaks out easily when the other cats try and be social with her. gosh...chill out biatch! the cats just wanna play with ur ass! 

i gotta say...these cats do bring some much needed happiness to the household. not saying that i am not happy now..or that the home situation is unhappy at all. it's just nice coming home to these little snuggley creatures that depend on your for food, love and companionship. whats best is that they really reciprocate. i always ask lts..."do you think they love us?" she says yes. i believe it too. rambo does this thing where he'll stand by the litter box and meow until i go over and clean the litter box...when i am done however...he like  butts his head around my feet and snuggles to me...hehe i guess he appreciates dads work . lol

in the house...we have 4 chinchillas (enough to line one fur hat). lts and i named them all after liquor. bailey, remy and morgan are the girls and jose is the boy. jose is a kinky fucker...he sucks his own penis! we've seen him! hahaha oh god...thats a blog in itself. newho!

my time is running up because i need to leave here pretty soon and pick up lts from work...so i need to think of something kool and thoughtful to say before i click "publish post"

i guess ill talk about music.

i made 4 cd's for my cousin gerard today. i think the track listings may be pretty good but i must say...i missed a bunch of stuff! there's so much GOOD music out there...and he thinks Linkin Park is the best band everr. oh god. the only reason he likes them is because his 14 yr old cousin (on his dad's side) listens to them. to be honest...linkin park isnt special. they're like..limp bizkits somewhat kooler cousins...and thats not saying much. heh. so anyways...on 2 of the cds i put some classics...some jimi, some pink floyd, etc...then i threw in some nirvana in there...some weezer...some radiohead...and others. on the other 2 cds i made one with the Cibo Matto album "Stereo Type A". on the other i put "on the strength of all convinced" by Daphne Loves Derby. granted these two artists wouldnt rank top ten on the lexicon of rock music...but i enjoy those two bands...so i hope that he would get an idea of what my thoughts are on what's good music. hopefully he'll enjoy it. i never had someone when i was younger introduce me to different types of music..besides like sitting in the car with my mom on the way to school...we'd listen to watever she had on the radio. 

i think ill write a blog tomorrow called "my love affair with women and music" it sounds promising huh? LOL. it also sounds like i could get in trouble for it too! LMAO. newho...ill update later tonight.

topics of discussion:

work

future endeavours

"my love affair with women and music"

school (starts monday! eek!)

weight loss (wah?)

i think thats all...i hope i remember to blog later. if not...who cares hehe. byes =D

howdy.

ok.

let me preface this with...this is my 5th successful (or at least i hope this will be one of them) blog style websites that i have or had during my time with the internets. i've had an opendiary, livejournal, xanga, myspace, facebook and now a blogspot. granted, myspace and facebook are now more considered "social networking" websites...they all really started as blog websites really...that got out of control. i kind of miss this whole idea that i can just blog and blog...and if someone wanted to comment..they can. i feel that the freeness of a social networking site has gone way too commercial and there's just not room for actual personal growth and/or expression. yes...you can hook up your myspace..but are you really showing ur personal style? or are you merely copying some css style sheet and changing the colors around? if you ask me, all those ppl that try to add soo much to their whatever page is masking the fact that they really dont have anything (of value) to say.

i like the feel of this, it's really livejournal-ish...but for some reason i got tired of lj. maybe i just got bored of it...or got to busy with other crap.

i'd like to keep up with this one and see how it works out in the end. lts (i'll use acronyms because everyone else is doing the same..lmao) came up with a snazzy url name and title for my blogger...i think it works! its nothing that i've used before like my old Flipunkid412 moniker and it's pretty clever to boot.

h'okay...with that all being said...here's a little info about me:

at present i am 25 y/o standing at 5ft 11 in. and im pretty much fat

you can change the word "fat" and replace it with any euphamism that you like...but it still boils down to the fact that i am medically considered "obese" thank god im not "morbidly obese". did you know that if you are considered "morbidly obese" you can receive SSI disability benefits?? haha my mom and i knew this shim named Freddie. Freddie was born a man and lived his life as a woman...his female name was "Chantal" LMAO! far cry from "Freddie" huh? funky. Freddie's sexuality is an entire story on its own. anyways...Freddie is like...600 lbs. he is on section 8 which provides ppl with low income, housing at ridiculously low cost. her rent at the time was 50 buck a month...for a 2 br. WTF? haha to add on that she received welfare benefits of up to $400/mo as well as $150/mo for food, medicaid and more money from disability. so basically she was living off the govt for being fat. she has since moved to fl and purchased her own house from the money she saved up over the years of living off the govt. fun times.

more about me...

i should have graduated college in 2004. i took off school sporadically for the past 8 years due to financial and familial issues. i also was burned out from all the crap i had going on in my life. i guess you can say that i am more determined to finish up school now. i must say though...school has lost its luster and sense of awe. it's still pretty exciting though! i was a history major for a while and i recently switched to finance. it may be a good move for me as the job i am doing now is related to this field and there is great potential for growth in the finance field. i miss the idea of being able to inspire young minds and actually providing a decent education...but that'll have to take a backseat while i focus on maintaining and establishing a fledgling family. i'm pretty sure that once school is over i'll be able to command my salary.

i plan on finishing up school, saving money, and opening a business of my own. this whole...answering to random bosses that are clearly inferior to me thing...isnt working out. i hate having to explain something to my frekkin boss because she cant understand simple math and then have to redo the work that i just spent the entire day doing...only to find out at the end of the day that she finally realized my points and wants the original work because what i did originally was correct all along. oi

religious views? oh god.

this is an ongoing question. does it even really matter? i will say that i do not subscribe to the traditional view of god or gods. whatev. christianity and all of its other retarded cousins can really suck it. it works for some, but not for me...and please...please dont call me "brother mark" we arent related...well possibly if you go back far enough. my mom is on this whole trip that if i go with her to church that the holy spirit will enter my soul and change me for the better. i dont think i need jesus to invade my body in any way. if you "need jesus" why did god give us free will to begin with? and if god is so good...why all the evil in the world...no no..dont say it..bc i know what you'll say..its the devil right? let me school you for a sec...the modern idea of hell as we know it..is a fallacy. its a idea for so called good ppl to impose on evil ppl so they have fear. i guess sometimes the threat of hell is one of the only things you can do to set ppl straight...but please..its not real. the idea of god is fairly new in human history...the idea of an afterlife is older while the idea of hell is newer than both. so i'd probably believe in god before i believe in the devil or hell...but i think i would say that an afterlife is more probable than both. i think that to everything there is a beginning and an end. otherwise existance wouldnt exist.

dont you think its a little self centered to think that one religion trumps all religions..and that one idea of god beats all others? haha what if the ancient greeks or romans where right? modern day jews and catholics would shit themselves...not only that...but it would also make some sense. Christianity is simply an amalgamation of all religions. Saints? ...or do you mean...greek gods and goddesses? Jesus? or do you mean...Jupiter..or Zeus? Immaculate conception? or do you mean divine births of ancient gods? Christmas..is a pagan holiday..so is Easter. shit...ppl dont even know what jesus REALLY looked like. some ppl say hes black. and once you get over what jesus looks like...what does god look like? is god a he..or a thing..at all? is it an energy? or just that initial chemical spark that started it all. haha...god could be a mistake! just like how some women accidentaly get pregnant...a la jamie lynn spears. What if the universe was created by accident and things just flowed from there. what if all ppl and beings that perish have a soul...their bodies decompose and give life to stuff..and their spirits turn into energy which would explain the ever expanding universe. havent they discovered the key to the universe already though? somewhere i read "the ever expanding universe is due to a phenomena called 'dark matter'" w0o0o! yey science.

how about parallel universes? haha oh man ill be writing all night.

newho.

i like all types of music. although i would probably choose to listen to some Jimi or Weezer or Nirvana or Cibo Matto before i listen to something else

im a dork, geek, goof, doofus or butthead but i am not...a dweeb.

i likes me some pot or some may call it the tree of life..or the burning bush

i'm married to my soulmate. she gets me =D

yey lts.

i <3>

i think thats all for now. i really wanted to talk about how crappy my day was at work...but i went off on a tangent. damn you brain!